Just Another Face in the Crowd?
A new study reveals speed dating may bring judgement to a grinding halt
A new study out of the University of Edinburgh offers some unnerving insight into the world of speed dating. Apparently, when faced with an overwhelming number of potential partners, people often resort to flawed systems of judgement.
“In smaller groups . . . people trade off different qualities in prospective mates - physical attractiveness for intelligence, for example. Faced with too much choice, however, we resort to crude approaches such as choosing solely on looks.”
In fact, the researchers found that, “as the size of the group grew, the offers became skewed towards just a few individuals, while the least popular ended up with fewer or no offers.”
NewScientist has the whole story here
So, if this is true of speed dating events with groups between, say 10 and 30 people, one has to wonder what kind of cut-throat standards most of us rely on to scope out possible dates in crowded pubs, clubs, and even on the street. And for that matter, how many times do we end up asking out people who ultimately fall short of our expectations?
A nasty side effect of living on an increasingly crowded Earth is the fact that we can often feel like lonely strangers in herds of thousands. It’s no wonder people turn to events like speed dating to jump start their love lives. But why make the extra effort if you’re still going to end up as just another face in the crowd?
Handsome or plain, who wants to be sized up by looks alone? Such superficial standards are always a setback for real romance. Plus, more often than not, singles who harbour crystal clear images of their ideal mate are the same saps that end up falling for the wrong people over and over.
The right approach? Whatever feels real. If you want to be judged on the content of your character, judge others with the same standards. Avoid situations that make you feel like an item up for auction, and opt for any chance to engage in honest, one-on-one conversation. If you’re really ready to get serious about making that special connection, consider letting a TopMatch expert introduce you to the kind of sincere singles you’ve been looking for.
“In smaller groups . . . people trade off different qualities in prospective mates - physical attractiveness for intelligence, for example. Faced with too much choice, however, we resort to crude approaches such as choosing solely on looks.”
In fact, the researchers found that, “as the size of the group grew, the offers became skewed towards just a few individuals, while the least popular ended up with fewer or no offers.”
NewScientist has the whole story here
So, if this is true of speed dating events with groups between, say 10 and 30 people, one has to wonder what kind of cut-throat standards most of us rely on to scope out possible dates in crowded pubs, clubs, and even on the street. And for that matter, how many times do we end up asking out people who ultimately fall short of our expectations?
A nasty side effect of living on an increasingly crowded Earth is the fact that we can often feel like lonely strangers in herds of thousands. It’s no wonder people turn to events like speed dating to jump start their love lives. But why make the extra effort if you’re still going to end up as just another face in the crowd?
Handsome or plain, who wants to be sized up by looks alone? Such superficial standards are always a setback for real romance. Plus, more often than not, singles who harbour crystal clear images of their ideal mate are the same saps that end up falling for the wrong people over and over.
The right approach? Whatever feels real. If you want to be judged on the content of your character, judge others with the same standards. Avoid situations that make you feel like an item up for auction, and opt for any chance to engage in honest, one-on-one conversation. If you’re really ready to get serious about making that special connection, consider letting a TopMatch expert introduce you to the kind of sincere singles you’ve been looking for.
posted by Nichole at
19:43
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