How Films Distort Our Ideas About Dating

Impeccably timed first kisses, epic adversity, and meticulously tousled hair are key elements in the silver screen’s representation of romance. And although this kind of drama might have you asking, “Pass the popcorn?” it may be harmful to the average person’s ideas about dating. Here are a few of the reasons why.

Impossible Conflict. Sure some movie romances have been torn at the seams by insurmountable obstacles of the most remarkable variety, but that inevitable tragedy is what brings urgency and passion to the relationship. Some of us feel the compulsion to create various obstacles in order to test or affirm our relationships, and that’s a shame.

Examples: Gone With the Wind, Casablanca, An Affair to Remember

Instant Love. Most lasting loves aren’t shaped in a heartbeat, but the cinema often suggests otherwise. In real life, you might have to come to terms with love at first sight as lust and sudden devotion, naïveté.

Examples: Titanic, Romeo and Juliet, Moonstruck

Flawless Chemistry. Even if you seem to absolutely click with someone special, invariably you will encounter differences and annoyances that cut down the ideal. In life these issues require patience and understanding, but in many films, they barely exist at all.

Examples: Sleepless in Seattle, When Harry Met Sally, The Matrix

So what makes a real romance?
True love comes from letting your relationship take on a life of its own. Afternoon strolls, late night conversations, and even shopping for groceries can be packed with heaps of simple, old fashion romance. And whilst the lighting and soundtrack may not always be stunning, your real-life romance has the best chance for a happy ending.

Lonely Holiday?

A White Christmas is no time to feel blue. If you haven’t yet found your perfect partner, here are some ways to manage a happy holiday season without feeling so alone.

Throw a party. Bring the festivities home with a fabulous holiday soiree. Invite friends and family as well as all of the neighbours and colleagues you’ve been meaning to get to know. Potluck style dining can cut back costs and makes for excellent conversation while white lights or simple candles will add classy but cosy atmosphere.

Bonus Tip:
For a festive aroma, brew spiced apple cider with a coffee maker. Simply fill the filter with brown sugar, nutmeg, allspice, and orange wedges, then pour plain cider in the water reservoir and brew. You can also brew it on the stove!

Spoil Yourself. No need to wait for Santa, when you can make your own holiday wishes come true. Treat yourself to the special gift or experience of your dreams (because if anyone knows how to shop for you, it’s you!) Next, rent your favourite films, stock up on snacks, build a glowing fire and you’ll have a sweet celebration tailored to your unique tastes.

Get Into the Spirit. Nothing beats feeling alone like reaching out to someone in need. You can find some amazing volunteer opportunities here that will brighten up your holiday as well as someone else’s.

Make a Change! You don’t have to spend the holiday alone! Get in touch with us today and you might just meet your perfect partner in time for the chestnuts and mistletoe.

Lonely Hearts, You're Not Alone

If you’ve been feeling lonely, you’re anything but alone. A report by researchers at Sheffield University and reported by the BBC and Daily Mail states that Britain is far lonelier today than in the last thirty years.

Why so glum? Most of us aren’t even friendly with our own neighbours, and with divorce and globalisation on the rise, people spread out and relocate regularly. Students are more likely to travel in search of quality, specialised education, and job transfers are more common, especially because people seem to have fewer local ties. In that way, the problem becomes a bit of a cycle. With fewer personal attachments, there are fewer reasons to stay put for very long.

The report, which formulated a loneliness index based on the national census and the Office for National Statistics’ population estimates, found that Edinburgh, London, Aberdeen, Dundee, and Devon were among the loneliest places to live.

What does this mean for dating? Only that the need to get proactive is greater than ever. Anyone who has tried long-distance dating knows how exhausting and heartbreaking it can be, and sitting home alone is certainly not a suitable alternative. The good news is that more and more people are opening up to sensible solutions, from professional local introductions like TopMatch, to exchanging friendly hellos with neighbours and co-workers. The world may seem lonely, but the truth is that we are all looking for a little company.