Can’t Figure Out Your Boyfriend? – Maybe This Will Help

Does your boyfriend baffle you?

Join the club.

Most women, as skillful as they are at relationships, just sit in amazement at some of the things their boyfriends do. Well, maybe this will help. What follows is a translation guide that will help you understand your man. The next time he says one of these typical “guy lines,” you’ll know exactly what’s going on.

* "I'm going fishing." What this really means is: "I'm going to stand by a stream with a stick in my hand all day, while the fish swim by in complete safety."

* "It's a guy thing." Really means: "There is no rational thought pattern connected with it and you have no chance at all of making it logical."

* "Can I help with dinner?" Really means: "Why isn't it already on the table?"

* "Uh-huh. Yes, dear." Really means: “Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned response.”

* "It would take too long to explain." Really means: "I have no idea how it works."

* "We're going to be late." Really means: "Now I have a legitimate excuse to drive like a maniac."

* "Take a break, honey, you're working too hard." Really means: "I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner."

* "That's interesting, dear." Really means: "Are you still talking?"

* "I've got reasons for what I'm doing." Really means: "And I sure hope I think of some pretty soon."

* "I can't find it." Really means: "It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so I'm clueless."

* "You know I could never love anyone else." Really means: "I’m used to the way you yell at me and realize it could be worse."

* "You look terrific." Really means: "Please don't try on one more outfit. I'm starving."

* "I'm not lost. I know exactly where we are." Really means: "No one will ever see us alive again."

OK, so there’s not a lot of wisdom there – at least not from a guy’s perspective. But hopefully, it’ll give you some laughs.

Quoted from “What He Says – What He Means,” Laugh of the Day e-newsletter, http://www.crosswalk.com/, 12/02/2006.

(Steve Kroening is the publisher of www.wisdomsedge.com)