Should you marry your first love?

Your heart is pounding. You can't think straight.

The only thing on your mind is the wonderful, amazing person you've met. You can't keep your hands off each other. You spend hours just staring into one another's eyes. The chemistry is breathtaking. You're head over heels in love.

This is the person you've been waiting for... your first love. You've found your life partner. Or have you?

First love is a tricky beast. Scientists have proved that the feelings we experience when in love are generated by hormones and chemicals.

When we're young and in love for the first time, whether we're conscious of it or not, our bodies are hell bent on procreation. You might think you've fallen in love with a person. But you've actually fallen in love with the way they smell!

Humans are attracted to people whose immune systems are very different from their own. This ensures our offspring are genetically strong. And, on a subconscious level, we can smell the difference.

From then on our body chemistry relentlessly keeps up the pressure. And it works. Most people who marry their first love obediently have children as soon as they can possibly manage it!

But once that magical 'pure love' phase has passed, as it always does, what are you left with? No longer blinded by all-encompassing lust, do you have anything in common?

In many relationships, this is where the problems start.

If you're currently in a deep state of love and lust, experiencing the first flush of your first love, good for you. Have a lovely, lovely time. But think twice before making your first love your life partner.

A few fortunate people stay with their first love for the rest of their lives. But most of us find that once the glow wears off, there just isn't enough left to sustain a marriage.

Later loves and second marriages seem to have a better chance of survival. You're older and hopefully wiser. You've probably fulfilled the overwhelming physical need to have children (if you ever had it!). You realise there's much more to love than lust; things like friendship, shared values, intelligence, humour... all the day to day stuff.

Perhaps not as exciting as the rollercoaster ride of your first love, but much more enduring.

Looking for the perfect woman? Forget dating sites!

Are you looking for your perfect match? Frustrated that you can’t seem to find a generous, loving, warm, clever, funny woman?

No wonder. You've got it all wrong. You've been trying to find your dream woman through online dating sites.

But...

No buts! Dating sites are dodgy ground. Think about it. You can type in anything you like. The average dating site profile isn't much more than a listing. You can lie until you're blue in the face and nobody checks.

OK, so you're actually an accountant. But you've joined so many dating sites you've lost count. On one of them you're a seven foot astronaut with a great sense of humour and no kids. On another you're earning a cool hundred and fifty thousand a year, posing around in a Ferrari. And you're sure you remember signing up somewhere new as a professional footballer. Oops.

This is all great fun. But it won't get you anywhere. Women like honesty and they hate being messed around. If you lie on your profile, as far as she's concerned you'll probably lie about everything else too. Keep it up and they'll stay away in droves.

Even worse, one of the biggest reasons women choose online dating sites is because they're short of time. The last thing they need is you wasting precious spare time claiming to be something you're not.

Most women want someone who is confident, not afraid of commitment, with a sense of purpose. But the biggest quality of all is honesty. It wins hands down.

Take it from me, most women would prefer an honest, straightforward, kind bloke with a beaten up VW Beetle than a liar with a Porche.

As a result there's a glut of men on most dating sites. The women are jumping ship, and who can blame them? But all is not lost...

One dating site verifies, interviews and checks all its members. So what you see is what you get. Women love it because they know they're getting exactly what it says on the tin. Men love it because... well, there are plenty of women there!

If you're serious about finding the perfect woman, tell the truth. The real you is probably exactly what she wants. Bite the bullet, head over to TopMatch and check out their membership options. You can even pay as you date!